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Something interesting I've noticed about gender amd social interactions
| It also somewhat applies to people who know me well. There's 7 people in my life who know me pretty well. One enby, 3 men, 3 women. All of them know I go by any pronouns and use a mix of all the 3 "normal" ones
But again, the men use he/him more frequently than other pronouns, women she/her more frequently, the enby they/them more frequently
And tbh it's got me kinda curious as to what that comes from. My current theory is just that people tend to see themselves in others, but...
| that's where the exceptions come in. Cause most exceptions have come from people who are romantically/sexually interested in me, and what those people mainly refer to be as is whatever is the preference they lean toward
Straight men: she/her
Straight women: he/him
Gay men: he/him
Lesbians: she/her
Etc..
So honestly I'm not completely sure, but I'd love to hear outside opinions on this info and look into it further
| Read a little comic that described a "chameleon" person who changed their gender and pronouns based on their own feelings moment to monent. People could grasp that they used all pronouns but not that they rotated through them at their pace. Some didnt understand the idea of being fluid and some just had a preference for one aspect of this person.
Everyone responds differently for different reasons. Humans are weird.
| >>959801
Hmm. Sounds like an interesting comic.
It's curious how it irl happens without people knowing though. Only those 7 I mentioned actually knew what I am. I've never been asked about pronouns except for at pride lol, but still it varies so heavily but with some patterns to it
Humans are weird for sure. That's why I'm so intrigued by this though, cause I love understanding how people work. I'm pretty autistic about human behaviour stuff
| >>959801
Oh and that part about understanding I've definitely noticed. There's a lot of people who struggle with that concept, mainly due to the intentional lack of education about it
The preference part I feel like surely applies to what I'm describing though. That has to be a main part of it. A lot of people tend to prefer friends/people to talk to that are of the same gender as them, probably due to relatability, so that probably plays a big part in how they perceive me
| Hmm. Probably not entirely relevant to you op, but my first language isn't English, and my first language doesn't use gendered pronouns at all. When I talk about others in English, if I don't actively think about their gender, I constantly mix them up (I'm sorry people).
So it's interesting that, as you say, some people consistently use specific gendered pronoun to refer to you.
| So it's like, for me and probably others with the same first language, my brain defaults everyone to "any pronoun"? At least when talking about them in the third person.
Anyway op, are you saying you personally know at least four people, of different gender and sexual preferences, who are interested in you romantically/sexually? Damn, op. How?
| >>959852
Ah, I see. That honestly sounds really nice. Gendered language is completely unnecessary imo
A little tip if you struggle with gendered pronouns (that at least works in English) just try to default to whatever is the neutral one there (so in English, they/them). That's usually a cheat code for avoiding angry people
>>959853
I don't "personally know" them lol, but I've been on dating apps and been outside ans gotten flirted with/cat called which is where I'm pulling it from
| They/them
Saving my dumbass from unnecessary accidental conflict since 2010.
| I'm not reading any of this
| Schrodingers gender. They them is risky in itself though. Especially if it's (s)he/they and they prefer the gendered pronoun.
It's safer but it's also kinda sad when they feel a little invalidated but won't express it. :(
| >>ff1357
Man expresses lack of interest in reading then says "I'm him" - 2023
Honestly that's modern art
>>959884
For sure, but that's just how it is. For as long as we live in a world where shit like that matters there will always be people who're hurt by it. Just gotta learn that what matters is that you know and accept yourself
>>959868
Nah but fr I don't get why people are so hesitant to embrace it. Makes social interactions way easier
| This is a really interesting video which I think covers it well:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DLzxrzFCyOs
| Not to compare you to an animal, but I've found that this doesn't just refer to real people either. I have shown animals in public places and women were more likely to call my dog she and men he.
I have English students who have to look at shittily printed images and describe them to me. While they never use they (its NOT acceptable here yet) they almost always use their own pronouns whenever they can't tell what the person in the picture looks like.
| >>960003
I can recognise that link bro, nice try though
>>960013
Ofc lol, and honestly gender in animals is a very thing to look at and compare with humans. We are just animals after all, and how we perceive gender in animals and how certain animals have similar gender concepts to humans is pretty cool
Sick! So it's a recurring thing just in general. That's really good info
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| I'm gender fluid, and when it comes to both looks and voice I'm fairly androgynous. Haven't done any voice training or actively tried to look like that, but ig it's fate or some shit
So, what I noticed is that people tend to refer to me as whatever they're most comfortable with for themselves. Women tend to use she/her, men tend to use he/him, and even those neutral enbies tend to go for they/them
Obviously there's some exceptions, but it's still very much a recurring pattern