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Share your autism
| >mfw you can't replicate ancient greentext stories on danger/u/, because the text is violet
| >be me
>16
>people on the internet say cats are nice
>sister has allergy so you never have one
>somehow never interact with cats
>getting groceries
>see a cat strolling by
>throw it some meat
>pick it up and start petting it
>feelsgoodgurl.mov
>it suddenly scratches the shit out of your jacket and runs away
>what.jpeg
>have to explain to your mom what happened to your new jacket
>get ass whipped
0/10 never touched cats again
| >be me
>12, bilingual
>dad brings home a toaster (called a griller in my native language)
>the next day
>hungry
>decide to make a grilled cheese
>put kraft cheese in between two slices of buttered bread
>the cheese melts and gets inside the element
>toaster is on fire
>fire brigade called
>fire marshal figures the toaster shorted out
| i really don't know how i'm still alive but i have a lot of those.
| I will give you a piece of my autism. But make sure to give it back when your done.
| Oh, I have lots of these, but on top of my head
>be me
>anti social
>sophomore at uni
>contacted by mid school friend
>keep the normie facade
>reunion talk
>remember that she moved to different island
>jokingly say "why not"
>she said she'll visit soon
>ohshit.jpg
| >few days later
>meet her at school
>meet teachers
>thank god it's over
>she'll be in town for a while
>reunion talk (again)
>say "let's do it" while dying inside
>contact friends
>remember that I was not a popular kid
>friends like reunion idea
>plan to do it after she left
>only 3 friends want to go
>she said it's fine
| >d day
>time to go
>autism finally kicks in
>why bother
>didn't talk much with her at school
>don't like people
>don't want social life
>don't want gf
>what am i doing with my life.jpg
>...
>...
>...
>grab phone
>text her
>apologize and say I can't make it
>turn on airplane mode
>no idea what happened
>to afraid to ask
>never talk to her ever again
| >Be me: sitting on but quietly when stupid edge lord kids randomly start talking about autism
>join in conversation and argues a little bit because all of them don't even know what the spectrum is and think autism is down syndrome
>I say I have high functioning autism
>random fatass: if you had autism you wouldn't be on this bus
>...smh
| >16, extremely shy and introverted high schooler
>friend asks me for help with an math problem
>one girl who used to talk to him sometimes heard this
>asks me for help with one math problem as well
>i explain it well (still don't know how i did it without being extremely nervous)
>she thanked me and asked if she could sit next to me during the test to copy my answers
>i say thanks to her and my face gets extremely red as i realized what i had just said
>she laughs and leave
| I think autism and social anxiety are being used interchangeably here. Or are we just using it as a pejorative about actual autismos.
>The real aut
| >be me
>ruin life for no reason
| >try to sell a laptop on local auction site
>private number calls
>"hello?"
>a 12 year old in the receiver makes a fake orgasming sound "helloo ahh i would ahh like to buy a laptop ahh"
>realize that I don't have autism
>hang up
>he calls again
>this time automatically his number is revealed
>he burps into the receiver and hangs up on me
>post his number on gay dating websites
>try to call him again in a week
>"this number is disconnected from the line"
>satisfied :)
| Be me
Play MMOs
Pretend to be a chick just to get items
While playing, meet the hot lady who invites you to the clan
Become best friends
She turns out to be a lesbian
Keep pretending to be a chick even though you know it's wrong
8 months of online dating and cybersex
She tells me we need to talk seriously
She probably wants to meet in person
Be ready to admit the hideous truth
| Find out from her that she is actually a guy pretending to be a girl
My face when you realize that two guys had lesbian cybersex for 8 months
| WHEN I AM AT THE FAMILY HOME AND WHEN I GO ANYWHERE, I SAY THIS
- MOM I'M GOING OUT
AND MOM ALWAYS ASK
- WHERE ARE YOU GOING?
AND I JOKE SOMETIMES
- I'M GOING TO GIRLS HEHE
AND MOM AND THE REST OF THE RESIDENTS/GUESTS PRESENT WHILE TALKING ARE ALSO LAUGHING
-HEHEHEHE
AND WE LAUGH TOGETHER AND THEN I WALK OUT AND CRY SILENTLY
| >>939021 ok, can we get an autism review from the real source? Please review each of the red texts with the scale 1-10, how close it is to actual autism.
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| >be me
>11
>go to school trip to a farm
>try to impress others by making a smartass joke
>approach the farmer in front of everyone
>"you have nice dick"
>tfw meant yo say cock
>mfw he's a vegetation only
>since then be mocked everywhere because small town