This thread is permanently archived
Hey trans g/u/rls !
| go away
| >>770236 Aww I'm so happy for you g/u/rl! Heck yes, you keep doing you :D
Personally I'm currently trying to ignore my general gender crisis but I'm sure I'll get there some day. Much love!
| >>d1505f thank you ! hope your gender crisis will be over soon (maybe do some research, i know it helped a lot of my nonbinary friends)
| >>770244 Ahaha thanks for the well wishes! Honestly I think I'm doing pretty good on research (also talked to some of my nonbinary friends), I just feel like I'm ~faking it~ so. Ya know, I'll get over it eventually
| >>d1505f heard that from a lot of friends, and myself too (im a nonbinary g/u/rl). this feeling of ~faking it~ is a sign of dysphoria, so if you feel like faking it, it means you aint faking it ! [thats what i like to think]
| Genderfluid here, and, I'm happy for you! Haven't gotten to do much other than clothes sadly, but, I'll get to a place where I feel comfy eventually.
And, ay! At least I'm open about it, as opposed to how repressed and closeted I used to be.
>>770245 >>770246
Mhh. That feeling of "faking it" could also stem from anxiety. Or both at the same time. It's a hard thing to deal with, but, just remember that sometimes mental changes are what's missing. Not exclusively physical ones.
| >>14f0c1 of course, don't worry i was talking both mental and physical changes.
hope you'll get rid of that anxiety soon
| woops sorry responded to the wrong person i think, i'm new here
| Serious question: why are you trans?
| >>9f4ee6 thats a hard question right here but i'm gonna try to answer. i just don't feel like the gender i got when i was born is the one that truly represents who i am and how i feel towards myself.
i perceive myself, and of course, like to be perceive as who i truly am. hope that this answer satisfies ya
| >>770254
Thank you for the answer. I have some more questions, bit feel free to ignore them:
Why do you feel like a female?
| >>9f4ee6 first of all, and a lil tip, don't use female to describe a transgender woman :0. use girl or woman, female is linked to the biological idea, and a lot of trans people don't physically transition.
soooo, to answer, idk really know ? thaz just how i feel ! it may be because i don't like masculinity as a concept when tied to me, but tbh i don't really think bout it.
i'm a girl cuz i feel like i'm one, it's as complicated has it gets.
| >>f79774 you have the right to think it is, i definitely don't know you so acting like i was offended would be pointless
| >>9f4ee6 being trans is not about hating yourself :0
it's about loving and understanding who you really are !
some people don't like how they look or are at all tho, and thats something they are trying to deconstruct into this true version of themself
| I'll join in on some of the questions.
>>770256
Having a gender identity that differs from your physical sex is less of a feeling, and more like an instinct, so to speak. There is a reason why gender and sex are separate words, even though most people confuse them as being the same thing.
>>770267
Differing gender identities to cis are not related to self-hatred or anything else like that. It is something that you're born with, unlike feelings like self-hatred, anxiety, etc.
| >>770269
I'm sorry, but I cannot support an illness that stems from self disapproval. I love LGB people, but transexuality is a mental illness. People shouldn't have to fundamentally change themselves to accept who they are. I wish you well on your journey, although I do not condone self harm.
| Some stuff that I feel like putting out here:
To understand things like trans, it's very important to separate the concept of gender identity from the concept of emotion and biological sex.
It is also important to remember that stuff like different sexualities and gender identities are not a recent discovery. It's something that's been known and accepted for most of human history, but was censored and stop being thought to people during the last few hundred years.
| FUCK NO, I DIDNT MEAN YOU 9f4ee6
sorry for the confusion
| listen pal o pal >>9f4ee6
it aint a mental illness, it aint self harm or self hate, but thanks for asking questions anywau
| >>770282
Hehe. I was about to say. That would be, very contradictory.
I understand the thought process >>770279 has though, because I used to think about it in a similar way.
Truth is though, gender is unrelated to mental health or any sort of feelings about yourself, as well as it's separate from biological sex. But, when you don't know any of that or exclusively get information from public figures, like politicians, it's easy to fall into that mindset.
| >>770285
I don't pay any attention to politicians. I have no political party. I want you to explain to me how disapproving of how you were born is in any way healthy. Your penis is natural to you. It's not something to be cut off.
| People with a male body presenting both masc and fem or exclusively fem as well as making changes to their body to female more comfortable is nothing new, and it is in fact natural and a part of human nature.
Same thing goes for people born with a female body and presenting both or exclusively masc, making alterations, etc.
But, during colonisation the white people in power basically said "gender is outdated, we're above that" and started oppressing and killing everyone like that.
| >>770287
It is not disapproving how you were born. It is accepting it.
Gender is something you're born with.
Sex is something you're born with.
They are not the same thing. Biological sex comes in two forms. Gender identity comes in 6 forms.
That is not new, that is not related to mental health, that is a natural thing for humans. I suggest doing some research before coming to conclusions on your own.
I can provide some sources for you if you're interested.
| >>9f4ee6 aint nothing natural nowadays (look at what you're using to communicate), its not cuz something isnt natural that its bad. also aint sure i wanna cut my dick yet, not all trans people wanna do that
| >>770291
I know we're on the same team here, but I also have to disagree with you slightly.
Gender identities like yours are in fact natural, despite people in power post-colonisation like to pretend like it isn't. There is tons of both history and research to back that up.
Now, for the agreeing, yes. Not everyone removes body parts. It is not a requirement. Gender is about appearing how your body tells you it wants to appear. Not adhering to norms invented my colonisers.
| >>770290 >>770291 >>770293
To be trans comes with a rejection of the self. I honestly don't care about gender and sex, but at the end of the day, somebody looks in the mirror and is dejected by what they see. Not in a superficial way like weight or looks, but in a fundamental way. You people fundamentally disapprove of how you were born. You can't even be comfortable in your own skin. At least a femboy is secure with himself. What about you? You are at war with your own body.
| >>14f0c1 damn you still are saying true facts
the "ain't nothing natural" was more of a way for me to make them understand that the idea of "natural" in our society makes no damn sense and it shouldnt influence our morals
but you are adding a lil bit of valid spice to the mix, and thats really helpful to me, or people trying to learn bout that so thank ya
| >>9f4ee6 damn i wonder if you actually are reading what people are saying in here, again, it's not about hating the self at all :(
its about finding the true self, lying under shitty gender clichés and stereotypes, who you feel comfortable in
| i sure am saying damn a ton aight i lol
| >>770295
If you want to ignore the essentials needed to discuss something like this then, what's really the point on continuing?
It's the body rejecting itself. Not the mind rejecting the body. You seem to be hung up on the idea of gender dysphoria being a mental thing. As long as you have that mentality you're never going to understand that, and if you refuse to research or listen to educated opinions, then you just don't want to understand.
| >>770296
Yeah. The idea of what is "natural" got completely twisted when those cults rose to power and started censoring and removing everything and everyone that wasn't a part of their concept of an ideal world. But because they beat their ideals that were unrelated to nature into people and abused and kill those who didn't listen, those thoughts have been ingrained into society at this point. It's sad.
And, I'm glad you think I'm helpful.
| >>14f0c1 you really are helpful, i'm glad you're here. bonus: know that you're cool and your friends love you.
funny how video games can make you meet really nice people
| >>770301
Aw. Well, thank you! That's really sweet. I'm glad that you're here as well. Threads like these are a very good way of educating people who are uneducated and spreading understanding of these sorts of things. Now that people are finally getting sick of the oppression and misinformation by the people in power, open forums with few people at a time is a very healthy thing, both for people like us and people unlike us.
So, thank you!
| >>770297
This entire post is ad hominems with no substance.
>>770299
>It's the body rejecting itself.
That's not a good thing. You can hit me with all the literature you want, but "the body rejecting itself" is not a good thing. Literally just read that statement out loud.
| >>14f0c1 >>5cb124 Huge kudos to both of you for sitting out the discussion and trying to educate ppl
| >>770306
So what do you want to do about it?
Do you think we'd be better off dead or pretending like it's not the case? I mean, that's what the colonizers thought, but it only made life a living hell for everyone who wasn't cis.
I don't understand why you have so much against adaptation. We finally have the technology to properly do what our bodies are telling us to do, and doing so makes the body feel at ease.
So, what do you suggest?
| >>9f4ee6 Well I guess using any kind of medicine or even getting prosthetic for those who need them is just bad cause it isn't "natural". May as well live in a cave too while you're at it
| >>9f4ee6 your only argument to things is just "thats not good" or "it aint right", feel like you are the one who is spitting stuff with no substance, coming from misinformation
i mean you were asking questions (good move btw), from people who are actually quite informed and because it doesnt suit your vision of things you reject it, was hoping you would get it
| Okay, so, here's the thing right. Life is harder for people who are not cis. Just, like, baseline it's harder, because of what I explained above.
So obviously, it is not ideal. But the world is not ideal. Humans, by nature, are not built ideally. We as a species, are not imperfect.
So explain to me why helping the people who are born worse of is somehow worse than telling them to shut the fuck up and pretend like the world is ideal, when it isn't.
What is the logic behind that?
| People who have a similar thought process to you love throwing out suicide statistics. Like how some trans people kill themselves, even after transitioning. But the reason behind it is never talked about by those same people.
The reason is because they are actively oppressed and told that they shouldn't exist, because their existence doesn't fit certain people's ideals. That's why they kill themselves. Not because they're trans, but because people fuck them up just for existing.
| ^^^^^^^^^
| As well as that it is also because of the idea of "passing". People love to say stuff like "You'll never be a real man/woman" because they do not understand the science behind gender nor the science behind biological sex.
Those are the main reasons that some trans people, despite having transitioned, kill themselves.
Just thought I'd put that out there as well.
| Obviously, in some cases it is also because of stuff like trauma from things like abuse, but, that is usually unrelated.
My point being, people love saying that the suicide statistics prove that being trans is a mental illness or related to mental illness, while that is in fact just not the case. It's because they are a marginalised group that from birth have it harder than others and actively get treated horribly for the fact that they do not fit the colonizers ideals.
| again thx for explaining that.
must admit im kinda dizzy (from drinking ofc), you're doing some amazing job i'm not really able to do rn
| >>770308 >>770309 >>770310 >>770311 >>770312 >>770313 >>770315
I think people should always be who they are. I'm not trying to antagonize you, or /pol/ you, I just know that you can't accept your birth body. That's sad and your whole life is positioned around discomfort and disapproval. That's why I view "transexuality" as a negative thing. It goes beyond androgyny or anything like that. You people have to chemically and physically alter yourselves to such a high degree.
| >>770319
Oh well I 100% agree with you. It is sad, and I do live a life of discomfort and disapproval. Having gender identities that aren't cis makes life very hard, and we get treated badly by people because of the thing that's already causing us to struggle from birth.
A lot of us do have to physically alter our bodies to feel comfortable, and it sucks. But, that's just even more reason as to why it would be nice if we got help and acceptance, as opposed to even more disapproval.
| >>770320
No, >>9f4ee6 actually used correct terminology. I can't blame you for not realising. You have been drinking after all. But, no reason to act like that. Especially when they were correct in what they said.
| okay i may be drunk but i know the right term is transgender . transexual implies all trans people alter their sex wich aint true.
>>14f0c1
| >>770322 Eh some people dislike the connotation of "transsexual", so it kinda fell out of style. So while yes, not technically incorrect, many people ask not to use the word anymore. Wouldn't really say anyone is in the wrong here, but using transsexual rather than transgender does *usually* imply certain mindsets etc etc.
| >>770323 >>770324 >>770325
Yeah, it does, and I agree. I think that term shouldn't be like that. But, it is what it is currently, sadly. But I don't agree with educating, without educating. You should have provided and explanation for why you dislike that term, instead of just saying "you're wrong". But, now that the explanation is written, it's not a problem.
It is correct terminology despite not being preferable, so, I prefer letting it slide until people are more educated.
| >>770329 Also a fair stance. Idk I feel like educating people is a huge mess most of the time, so I can't fault anyone here. Shit's hard and frustrating
| >>770329
I know some people disagree with me on the way I handle that, but, that's what has had the best results for me. Because, that way you don't antagonise the person you're educating and you avoid them feeling attacked, which is important to avoid when educating. It's like how you shouldn't talk about advanced combos in fighting games before having thought someone the basics of the game, you feel?
| >>770333
Don't be sorry. Just keep it in mind from now on. No need to move too fast. Helping people understand is what's important, so you should take it at a decent pace instead of doing it quickly. And always, always provide the explanation for what you're saying. Without the explanation it becomes very alienating to people who are trying to learn.
| >>770334 True that, I think it's just hard to find the line between not antagonizing anyone and letting them get away with shitty behaviour. Like the fighting game metaphor tho
| And, yes. I do want to work as a teacher. That's why I talk about education like that.
| Just more proof that people are too fucking complicated for their own good.
| >>770335 I may not know you but based on what I've seen so far you seem like a very sensible and patient person. I applaud you ngl
| >>770340
Aw. Thank you!
I just, idk. I know a lot of people who have a hard time understanding things and who have grown up in environments where miseducation, bigotry and general dear of everything foreign is very common. I've also had some twisted views of certain things in the past myself. So I know that patience and understanding is very important. If people suddenly started yelling at you that something you've believed all your life is wrong, would you not be taken back by it?
| That's what's important to keep in mind, right. You want discussion. You want to be able to see both sides point of view. That way you can go back and forth and find the stuff that is illogical/misconceptions and break it down bit by bit. It is a person's whole life view we're talking about, you know? So even if a part of that view is misinformed, aggression isn't gonna solve it. It's only gonna make them defensive. If you're sensible, they'll be willing to challenge themselves.
| >>770346 I think you have a really good point, and I'm right there with you. I've actually ranted about this to a friend before.
Unfortunately, I've had some important people in my life be frustrating as hell about these things even after repeatedly explaining and talking about these things, so I generally shy away from putting a lot of energy into educating people unless they really matter to me.
Which is why I admire you even more for how you deal with the situation^^
| >>770347
In some cases, people are a lost cause, sadly. People can't be forcefully educated. They need to be open to the idea of challenging their perception of things before they can let someone change it.
That's why school students who don't want to learn won't learn. It's a mental block. And if someone isn't willing to set aside that mental block, then they can't be educated.
But, I can tell that >>9f4ee6 is open to challenging themselves, so, I educate.
Also, thank you :)
| i'm really glad i've been able to create this thread and read many great people being nice and educative.
i'm going to sleep, good night <3
| >>9f4ee6
When you say, "you can't accept the body you were born with," I think you are making an assumption that is backwards. If you are a trans woman, it feels like you were born a woman and you are trying to fit this idea that society had that you were born a boy and should be a boy. So, doing things like transitioning is accepting the person you are, which includes being trans, and pretending to be your birth gender is denying it.
| I'm not trans, but I have a friend who is a trans man that I had a conversation about this with. He says he isn't trying to become a man when he was originally a woman, but that he's always been a man and he used to be trying to become a woman because that's what other people expected when they looked at him.
| Hello everyone!
I support transgender people and their search for comfort with themselves :D
But about the trans experience, I have a question: How do you feel about your bones' shape? I've seen many trans people being frustated with them sadly.. :c
Is there a safe way to "fix" them to make them more in lone with your desired gender? Do you know any technology and/or advances on that area?
I'm not a trans person, but I do believe that your bones'shape are a big thing visually :(
| >>770396
Quick correction: A trans womans birth gender is, well, female. Their physical sex at birth is what's male. Easy to get it mixed up, but important to distinguish.
Other than that you're completely correct.
>>770410
That's a though one. I'm lucky to have a not very big form, and I'm gender fluid so the goal of my transitioning stuff is androgyny. Not one thing or the other. So I don't mind it personally. But I know some people do have some problems with it.
| Trans women are better than women women just saying
| But thanks for the enlightment <3
| >>770448 >>770470
Cis women is the correct terminology, yeah. "Women women" or "real women" implies that trans women are fake, which is scientifically incorrect. "Cis" means that your gender identity matches your biological sex, which is why that term is heavily preferred.
| If u are a woman, i love u
| Until we fuck and i disappear in the morning, while you wake up to see the open window and the wind blowing the curtain
| >>770506 >>770507
You have the right mindset. The reasons those words exist in the first place is because people don't acknowledge women as women or men as men. You're a level above most.
| Sex is more valid than gender.
You will never be a woman.
Age will show me right. The mirror will spit it right back at you.
This thread is permanently archived
| just came here to say yall are still valid, even after pride month, and that yall are beautiful !!!
it's going to be a year since i came out and im glad to say i feel sweet and cool !
i recently started wearing makeup and having ponytails and it makes me feel so like, like who i am, i hope you will or are living this kind of epiphany :).
luv yall, have a great day