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Poetry Exchange Thread
| (Do song lyrics count? Been a while since I've made any poems but I could drop a verse or something.)
| strawberry tea and ash lungs (translation):
the smell of strawberry tea spreads through my room
in every corner, in every hole, every little fracture or cleft
where before there was nothing, now there is something
and my lungs, once full of ash
are now fully occupied by a familiar scent of strawberry tea
it breathes through me
and I feel at peace
| >>743575
(Anything you feel that fits in a verse format is fine! Songs & Poetry aren't really that different imo)
>>743586
(This is really beautiful, there's such a nice sense of acceptance and calm in the last three lines)
| (Aight. I'll do one that doesn't need context then.)
Stuck in a fever dream, I'm tryna chase the light
I'm bursting at the seems, I'm feeling terrified
I'm 'bout to overheat, body is paralysed
All insecurities, they should get undermined
In this society
Struggling? Say fuck to sobriety
Hustling? Just drop it, pitch up to a higher key
Living off minimum? Climb up the hierarchy
Easy as that, huh?
| >>743589
(The sense of rhythm comes over really strong, even reading it in my head I can hear the pauses and how the silence fills in space in it. Idk your work has a really strong voice to it if that makes sense, I like it a lot!)
| >>743662
(Aw. Well, thank you! I've never really shared my lyrics like this before, so, I'm glad you liked it!)
| >>743589 this is some good shit, I really like how it flows and the sense of rhythm is really good, 10/10
| >>743769
Thanks :)
Might record and release the full song next week, but, not 100% sure yet. Might just save it for an album later this year.
| In the living room, a Thursday morning.
2:00 AM, sipping grass jelly, serene.
It’s unpackaged unconventionally, Opened from the bottom, and overturned.
Both hands over keys, warm light is comfort.
i never finished this
| Also, I'll drop another verse here since the thread seemed to stall and I want to see more:
| All this system and oppression shit, lil cunts feel inadequate, everyone be out of place and bigots run as candidates
Me? Might seem I'm out of it, but I top the world and shit, I don't need common approval cause I'm gonna earn that shit
Always gonna earn my tip
Put in time and taking risks
Put in work don't call it quits
I won't be held back just 'cause the leaders here oppressive and they hatin' it
In the streets making changes, while they up there and debating it
| >>743996
The imagery is really nice in this, it has a kinda tactile way of describing the scenery which I like a lot
>>744318
The rhyming schemes are sick in this, I like how they join up in the middle of sentences & even reading it you can hear the emphasis on syllables
I'm just finishing my shift but I'll post something when I get back home, it's rlly cool that people are into this
| >>744361
Thank you! I like trying out different rhyme schemes to see what sticks. I'll take it that this is a good one then.
Yes please! I'm excited to see more.
| Poem was too long to fit in character limit so it's in image format
https://anarchism.space/system/media_attachments/files/105/371/408/543/526/114/original/85aa943ed92f8c4b.png?1607840096
| >>744788
Fuck. That's bleak.
Really well written though. It had some really vivid imagery and made me feel, like, helpless. Well done.
| I'm digging this thread. Here's something I wrote a while back:
Gallery of Mirrors
What is in a mirror?
Your truest self,
A dream unrealized.
Hazy pools of honey.
A gray, rainy day
Puddles, thoughts
A mind unchained
Memories once bloomed.
A portal to space.
Stars like drops
In a cosmic sea
Behind cold glass.
| >>744789
Thanks, I'm glad the feeling comes across so well! It's definitely a grim read tho lol
>>744864
Ahhh this is really nice! The tone rolls really nicely, one line into the next. Definitely feels like a poem best read aloud.
| So, I have a question. I posted >>743589 a little bit back, and things are moving faster than expected. As in, full thing might release tomorrow. Would you poetry g/u/rls be interested in me posting it here?
| >>745077 Thanks, I really appreciate the kind words. It's in my portfolio along with my other work.
| >>745164
Aight. I'll share it when it's released.
In the meantime, I love seeing you g/u/rls poetry! Keep it coming!
| Well, too late now. You g/u/rls are slow. Here's the full song:
https://soundcloud.app.goo.gl/VEdP1
Hope you like it :)
| Beyond the shadow you settled for, there is a miracle illuminated.
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| (Poetry Exchange Thread, just post whatever you've been writing, or just come up with something on the spot.)
Luminous;
my body without
its organs,
that passes
through apparition wall
and lies upon the tarmac.
The flesh shaping,
receeding and reshaping
like the smoke
rising out,
being between things.
Electric
and patterned
the stars in exile,
in the life after death
that exists in sight.