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i'm struggling to get through school but i can't get motivated to fix myself
| and to make matters worse, every time i fuck up my parents take away all of my personal belongings for entertainment. which makes me feel even less motivated to do anything.
i'm not able to talk about this with anyone because i don't have any close friends and my parents just think i'm refusing to get anything done. i feel exhausted all the time and yet i do nothing every day.
| i feel like i won't go anywhere in life and getting held back a year is one of my worst fears because i know everyone in my family is gonna treat me like a retard if i do. if it ever happens they'll see me as a lesser being and probably treat me like shit.
i fucking hate this
| >>700310 I dropped out of highschool after failing senior year. Became a shut-in for about a year and it was shitty. Ended up getting a job, got my GED and I'm currently a freshman in college. Now I genuinely understand your situation. I still suffer from that lack of motivation and I understand the whole controlling parents thing. <1>
| >>700627 Honestly the reason why your parents take away your stuff is because they think it's a distraction. I won't lie, entertainment can be a big distraction. Big example is that I have 4 chapter of work due by monday that I slacked off on. So they may think that they're making the right move at the cost of tension between you and them. I'll be real and say that feeling of desperation did kind of help to get me to do something, but it strained my relations with my parents. <2>
| >>700629 Eventually that strain led to a massive shouting match between me and my parents. It wasn't pretty, but I knew I at least had some fault in it. This led to me having more discussions with my mom on why certain decisions were made. I began to understand why some decisions were made,BUT I also explained why I felt so restrained by it. So talk to your folks because human beings aren't mind readers. Now I'm not sure how old you are OP, but communication is key. <3>
| >>700633 Be respectful, but don't let your parents talk down to you if you're an adult. When I had my arguements I was 18 or 19 already. I know that 18 year olds can be retarded, but we still want to be treated like equals. Just try to get to that point where you at least understand what they're thinking even if they don't fully understand you. Don't let the tension build up because it's a big mistake I know this is long, but again I understand your situation. <4>
| >>700635 Now onto the motivation stuff. Learning is a very slow process. If you try to rush it, you'll probably just fuck up and become frustrated. Try to break down what you're learning to understand it, with a big example being math. I took a lot of honors and AP courses when I was in highschool. In math nothing was ever broken down to it's bare bones so it felt like random shit would appear out of nowhere. This led to me not understanding and shutting down due to frustation. <5>
| >>700636 At the time I just thought I was naturally bad at math, but now that I'm a couple years older I realized I just never got to see the big picture if that makes any sense. So what I'm trying to say is, break down what you're learning down into bite sized chunks as opposed to trying to stuff all the knowledge down at once. Another thing is your standards and reason for working. Don't let your reason to work be to impress others. It'll never work. <6>
| >>700637 Instead work to impress yourself. A lot of people push and strive for perfection, but to be frank that is impossible. You can't be perfect and you'll have to accept that. So instead work to the closest thing you can consider perfect AKA your own standard and slowly improve on it. That's what is working for me right now. If you don't have your own standard then I'll set it for you. Try to at least get Bs. Doesn't matter if it's high or low just go for it. <7>
| >>700638 When you hit that standard be proud that you hit it and improve on it. Maybe you'll eventually get As or maybe you'll just get stuck with Bs. Either way you should still take pride in the fact that you can hit your own standard. This might not work on hobbies when self-taught, but with hobbies I just say fuck it and have fun. It doesn't matter if you fuck up with a hobby because it's all for fun. <8>
| >>700639 So TLDR:
1) Have a discussion with your parents to try and understand each other
2) Take your time learning cuz rushing it usually backfires
3) Work for yourself at your own standard and not for others
4) Don't stress over hobbies. They're meant to be fun. The faster you accept the mistakes you make the more fun it'll be.
This all may sound like autistic gibberish, but hopefully it helps. <9>
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| i want to improve and fix my shitty grades but i keep holding myself back and i don't know why. i genuinely just can't be motivated to do anything at all. i can't even find motivation to do the things i love.
every time i try to learn something i end up forgetting it the next day and can never make progress or improve myself. i want to be able to be successful and i know that if i don't fix my grades i'm fucked, but i can never get passed the wanting part.