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Let’s create a story
| who lived in a sh/u/
| she played the trombone and only ate licorice
| the type of person that puts pineapple on pizza, or does milk before cereal. A demon of sorts
| no-one dared to ask her business, no-one dared to make a slip
| and her best friend's a talking panda!
| one day this girl decided to venture out to the big wide world
| But after almost being raped by 5 pokémon trainers, she becomes a sociopathic hermit
| >>607547 Game Over.
Goddammit we were doing so well there for a minute haha. How can we prevent this on the next run?
| let’s set some rules:
-our hero can not be killed, only near death situations such as, idk brain tumor which was later cured or this kind of stuff
-death occurs naturally after thread is being closed
that’s my thoughts, if u guys figure sth different out, post it and we will include that during next run
thanks y’all for participating
| Oh and maybe we should come up with a topic next time?
| >>607637 >>607638 but where's the drama without conflict?! How do you expect us to weave the fine tapestry of the storytelling art with such pointless censors. T'will be a boring, nay, mindless tale with neither stakes nor goal, and I cannot allow such drivel to exist!
| >>607547 LOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOL!
She then spent the rest of the 2010s lurking boards on the internet and shitposting as a typical g/u/rl. Until one day....
| >>607691 she's had enough of this clown world, and is starting to prepare for a righteous cleansing in due time, until then...
| ...It's taco Tuesday.
So she will have to go on a painful journey full of dangerous and curiously bizarre situations.
She packed only the most important things:
| Taco
| Taco
| First for her and second for her imaginary gf
| And so they began their journey.
Their first obstacle was..
| unsuspected diarrhea
| Unfortunately, there were people around and she had no choice but to...
| Use the creepy, wooden, rural type outhouse. At first, it was silent, when suddenly...
| Nightmares ensued. She shat so hard that even south africans perceived the sound as a possible nuclear explosion. The sound waves traveled 3 times around the world, shattering glass throughout the whole country.
After wiping her ass with baby wipes she went on.
On her way across the street she found..
| 100 USD laying on the pavement, it wasn’t normal bill, there was written something...
| about the information that could lead to Hillary Clinton's arrest. Ignoring the badly scribbled pictures of Alex Jones and Jeffrey Epstein, the bill looks usable, so she decides to...
| go to Mc Donalds and buy a Hamburger.
| but she realize this is burger king and not mc donald
| She decides to ditch both and go to KFC instead. Little did she know that it wasn't the usual KFC. Instead of the usual "Kentucky Fried Chicken", KFC actually stands for:
| „Karen Found Children” :o
| The sheer numbers of doges with divorce papers were overwhelming, but she decided to go in anyway. What happened next, however...
| should have been obvious. Our small g/u/rl was mistaken for a child and was immediately taken hostage!
| suddenly there's a dragon came to rescue
| A few prisoners that came by carriage not too long ago used the opportunity to run away. Our g/u/rl decided to do the same
| They move in silhouette. The moonlight guides the darkness near. Can’t you feel the night is young
| After running with the prisoners for some time they encountered a gypsy who promised to tell them their fates using tarot cards. The gypsy pulled a card seemingly at random and said. "Two dogs howl at the moon. One domesticated, the other a wild wolf. I need to see where this goes..."
| She'll remember that detail. Maybe it can be useful later. But for now, she thanks the gypsy and carries on.
She was now at the store. Only when she saw the hordes of people did she realize that it was black Friday.
The entrance seems to be blocked by people trying to get in
| This was bad. She needed the new ePhone 15X. And she needed it now. She had to hurry, so that she could also get the matching ePods 2 earbuds for a fraction of their normal price. Only $666! And what does that sign say? ePhone dongles? For $375??? What a steal of a deal. She checked her ePhone 14X for more deals, only to realize that Epple had deleted the operating system because it was now "out of date" and "time to upgrade". With the required $3800 in hand, she...
| Realises that she became what she swore to destroy. Remembering her true purpose, her eyes set on the consumerism engine of destruction, she...
| Then can't deny said purpose. She decided instead to purchase a cheep ass tank her uncle sold to her. Age did tell her one thing...
| That a cheap ass tank is a good ass tank, because massive prices are a capitalist construct which needed to be destroyed, so the cheapest was the best. After all, without capitalism. . .
| ...we would all be living in the future.
Literally
With her newly acquired tank, she smashed through the store walls
It was then that she understood what the gypsy wanted to say
Black Friday shoppers are rushing into the store
she can still reach the newest epple products in time.
On the opposite side to the epple products however, she sees a horde of shoppers coming her way
Between the girl and the horde was a wounded dog that would be trampeled to death
She had a choice to make
| In her ravenous hatred she chose the path of perpetual torment, and those that tasted the bite of her tank named her the Consoomerslayer.
None were spared from the torrent of destruction that followed, smashed products were mixed and mashed with flesh and blood of the hordes of sheep, so eager to run towards slaughter. In the end only she stood and the chaos that was created constantly reminded her of her true purpose. None shall escape. Tis not the end...
| It seems that the story of our little g/u/rl had taken an unexpected dark turn.
After slaughtering everyone in range and taking everything she needed, she continued her quest. This time, her destination was...
| Alps! Small and forgotten village where ancient tribe have lead its life for hundreds of years without any change. She found out that there is what she is looking for...
| was hidden inside her.
| With her newfound purpose and ePhone 15X, she decided to run down to the Tim Hortons to grab a double double. When she got there...
| She got attacked by a rapping rabbi.
He had the sickest punchlines and metaphorically destroyed her.
But there is one great weakness that he had
The girl swore loyalty to the Nazis and ran him over with her tank.
Because of this bizarre encounter, her main goal has changed...
| Meow~
| She had to prevent another rap attack. To buff her defensive stats against rap based attacks, she called upon the Rap G/u/rl of Danger/u/ to write the rap that she would use against the next foe. Rap G/u/rl, where you at? Out MC needs you!
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| There was small g/u/rl...
now ur turn