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[Radio] Radio Wire 18!
| "I fucking hate Norwegians" -N
"..That's a good start, should I do the honors?" -X
| >*A-HEM*
"Ladies and femboys, welcome to Radio Wire, where the music is big and our brains small. You know the hosts, don't ya? Doesn't matter cause you're about to hear 'bout us again" -X
| "I miss when we started every transmission with a joke, made the nights spicy" -N
"Oh that's why I let you talk first" -X
"What" -N
"You're the joke Neil, congratulations" -X
| "Anyways we're gonna-" -X
>Mic_drop.mp4
"Fuck, let me-" -X
>Struggling_for_the_mic.mp4
"Got it!" -X?
"Anyways--" -X
"--Your hosts for tonight's and today's beautiful transmission is us, you're listening to Neil Michaels who I promise you: his face is just as sexy as his voice" -N
| "..And Xii over here, I don't have a flashin' introduction but I'll tell you what I got, right after this message paid by our sponsors"
>Static ensures as the signal shifts
"At some point of course.."
>Mumbled Xii before an energetic feminine voice took over now
| >"Ever felt like the world is crumbling around you? Psychologists are both expensive and a scam but what is cheap and functional? Coffee is! Caramel Anne at 5th Westward Lane in Uptown is serving BBC: Breakfast, Biscuits and Coffee! Walk in today with the promo code R-W-I-R-E for a 15% off your purchase!"
>"Disclaimer: Promotions mentioned might not be still available"
| "Hey I wrote that!" -N
>"Imagine my shock"
"Now now, you're about to listen to this sweet track by-uh.. Yeah this track is pretty sweet. Turn down your surroundings and turn up the radio cause we're about to relax the drek out of ya'" -X
> 'Snowfall'
> Artist: Garoad.
>The music of the Radio is all you need right now
| >Call 555
| >Incoming call on 545
| >The music fades out eventually, prompting back the voice of Xii to the air
"That was snowfall brought to you by 'copyright warning'. Ya' hear what time it is now?" -X
"Time for calls, make sure to adjust your frequency everyone so the only voice you can hear here is mine, of course" -N
| >>751326
>Neil picks up on line '555'
"Hello hello sir, ma'm, or reptilian, you're now live on Radio Wire talking with the one and only Neil Michaels. If this is about that court appointment then I am not Neil Michaels, I'm definitely someone else"
| >>751355
>Xii picks up line '545' killing the line for just a few seconds before talking
"Ya' know where you're callin', let's skip the introduction and allow me to allow you to our beautiful show, tell us yer' name and yer' intentions with us now"
| >>751451
"Hey, Red here, and can I just say: you are not as sexy as your voice suggest."
>The voice coming through belongs to the by-now familiar Canadian.
>"Red, that's rude!"
"Oh, Alix's here too, of course."
| >>751456
"if it isn't my friend the maple syrup, the moose, the leaf, one could say! I find it so flattering that you think I got a sexy voice my man but what will Alix think about us?"
>Neil teased with more confidence than brains, just like the opening motto suggests.
| >>751459
"Well, not much, considering her first impression of you is you on the ground getting licked by Fenrir. If anything, she's worried you'll steal our dog."
>Red replies with the confidence matching that of Neil's. Alix's giggling can be heard in the background.
| >>751460
"Don't you worry my man in fact, hear this out, in fact, first, look, I-"
>And he goes on like this for a few more seconds
"Look, I'm more of a cat person either way ok? They're pretty much their own owners and will eat you when you die"
>For the next bit it is evident how close to the Mic Neil gets as he starts talking again
"Do you know how badass it is for a pet to eat their owner when they die? Dogs are lacking the guts to do that my man"
| >>751467
"I assure you, Fenrir probably would've bitten your face off if you didn't wake up."
>Red jokes back, laughing.
| >a call comes in from a familiar number, it's Polly
| >>751491
"Oh you see"
>Neil laughs in a way that no brave person laughs, his fear was well translated and poorly hidden
"You see, leashes aren't really expensive so you should consider one my man, in fact, I will buy you guys one if you can't afford it!"
| >>751355
>>751454
"Well thank you for callin' but Er- next time we talk I wanna hear more about you, I feel like we didn't really get to know each other y'know? Feel free to call again!" -X
>Click
| "Alright we got a call now saved up as, and I quote: 'scrap with makeup', most likely Neil's I'm sure so let's see who it mi--" -X
"--Real fucking funny you know what name says in there" -N
>One-sided snickers cover line '545' before Xii finally picks up
>>751725
"Hello there, you know my name, I know your name. But why don't ya present yourself for the people listenin' to the best frequency this station has to offer?" -X
| >>751815
"Hey there. It's Polly! The stand-up comic, shortage of chairs so can't sit down this time.
>there is a rimshot that plays through the audio line
"How you all been?"
| >>751807
"Funny you should mention that, actually. You see, Fenrir from the Norse Myths, the one we named him after, bit a hand off a god, then murdered Odin for putting a leash on him."
>Alix has moved closer to the microphone now, laughing a little bit after having recalled the myths.
"No, but actually we already have a leash for him, we use it when we leave him with a dogsitter or when we take him out for a walk."
| >>751844
"After that openin' I can't say that I'm bad, things lately have been.. 'opening' so we're all fairly good. What about you friend? Still haunting radio hosts?" -X
| >>751899
"Well last fu--damn time I saw you guys walking him I didn't notice the leash, you know, despite having him so close to my face while he licked my pride away?"
>Salty doesn't fully describe Neil's tone, or more precisely there's not enough salt in GC to properly compare it.
| >>752189
"I thought he was adorable. Besides, I didn't want him to be grumpy after we made him go through all the process dressing him up for halloween."
>Alix replies back defensively.
"By the way, thanks. Because of you, he became the fan's favorite among the SET boys. I didn't know you managed to somehow annoy the most powerful man in SET, that's an achievement and a half. Well, actually, nevermind, Golem's irritated by everybody's shit anyways."
>Red adds quite cheerfully.
| >>752188
>polly giggles
"Time to time. Building next door's stairway crashed harder than a lilim talking with an experienced hacker a-about b-b-buffer overflow.... sorry."
>sound of a quick metal scrape
"So yeah, that was spooky, luckily I wasn't in the A block."
| >>752201
"Look man I'm not saying I'm proud of it but I kinda have the talent of being real fucking annoying, why do you think I'm a radio host? But I'll add to my list of accomplishments that I pissed off your path to sucess" -N
| >>752648
"I'm sure Fenrir appreciated it, I'm sure he'll lick you thoroughly in appreciation next time he sees you. He's a grateful dog."
>Alix says, giggling once again.
| >>752217
"Luckily you showed up, I was completely sure that his brain finally melted and there was a actual physical evidence for that. It's refreshin' to hear your friendly voice in a city where rats each other to end up turnin' into bigger eats." - X
| >>752649
"haha look I have *never* punched a dog but on God Alix keep it away from me for you're all lucky that didn't kill me right then, right there, right on the spot" -N
| >>752652
"Jeez, you're mean, Neil. Alright, noted, I'll find a dogsitter next time we meet."
>Alix replies again. Red then adds;
"I'm sure the SET boys will be more than happy to grant you that request."
| >>752651
"Happy to help! Been a bit so figured I'd mention in case some concerns since it was near our place."
|
| >>752653
"Look man, I love dogs but that thing probably eats first graders. Also, explain to me what EST is like if I was slow" -N
>"if"
"Yeah 'if', fu--screw you" -N
>Neil clears his throat before halting the interruption.
"I want to know who I'm pissing off so I can start doing it properly from now on" -N
| >>752676
"To be honest Polly ever since our encounter with ya' I believe you're immortal. If a meteor took down half of the city today I'll be sure that we'll find ya' somehow, hauntin' some Radio host or makin' an audience laugh and cheer like if they lived literally anywhere else" -X
| >>753327
"Uh, hold on, let me see."
>Red clears his throat.
"Uh, I think most of them's ex-military of some kind, at least two or three is ex-special forces. Also, Golem apparently used to hunt bears once, he had this bear fur Sabre made into a cloak for a joke. Golem stopped talking to him for a week straight."
| >>753337
"Man that's so cool I really pissed off G.I Joe and friends all on my own! Don't they know I weight less than an arm? These men can hunt bears but a few words hurt them I see"
>There wasn't a hint, but a whole aura of pride in Neil's voice
| >>753329
>polly lets out a laugh
"I don't know about that. I guess it wouldn't be so bad as long as I can make people smile. I got to go soon let everyone know I wanted to say Hiya and I'm doing okay if they heard that apartment news!"
| >>753421
"Oh, you'll be surprised at how much Golem gets irritated by random shit. Don't worry though, he usually lightens up after a beer or two."
>"I think they're a pretty nice bunch though."
"Nah, I think that's just you. You're pretty universally lovable."
>"Oh, shut up."
>You can hear a playful slap and Alix giggling in the background
| >>753423
"Wait wait let's backpedal here and don't make a bicycle noise at that, what happened at the apartments now? I could swear we were still talkin' about that incident when your body.. well.. y'know, got caught in that fire like a year ago" -X
| >>753448
"Man you two keep being so lovingbirds to each other and I swear I'm gonna make us all 3 so very uncomfortable!" -N
>If that wasn't a threat it surely sounded like one
"My uncle had diabetes, and he was as cranky and sugar-filled as all that you just told me now" N
| >>753676
>"Sorry."
>Alix replies sheepishly. You can hear Red clears his throat trying to find something else to talk about.
"Anyways, have you heard? Alix's new novel is out."
| >>753675
"What? No no... no. Needed three for tri cycle noise rather than bi cycle."
>rimshot
"Heh, sorry, no the apartment's stairwell was just completely destroyed. People saying a weird lady and giant monster was involved."
| >>753683
"jeez sorry, didn't meant to kill the mood like that. What were her novels about? I remember inquiring if smut was a part of them and if so when do I get my free copy out of being famous" - N
| >"No, Neil, smut isn't a part of them. Well... not yet, anyways."
>Alix clears her throat as she moves up closer to the mic.
"So my new book, 'The Blue Havens', is a fantasy adventure book following the life of Hans Bluestone. This is the first of my new series 'The Shore of Krieg'."
| >>753781
"man we disappear for just a few months and miss the best scoops, I guess it's better that we find out just after hearin' that you're ok" -X
"Is polly ok?" -N
>Neil yelled out away from his mic
"I'm NEXT to you and I literally just said she was" -X
| >>753815
"Bo-ring. At least with that title you'll get a bunch of nerds buying it. Mind telling us what is it about? You got some free advertising right here right now, it'd be plain stupid not to use it" - N
| >>754037
>There's a small rustling across lines, almost like the rustling of someone trying to listen and response to two lines at the same time
"He was spot-on on the meteorite thing, the fact that you were literally inside me talking to my head proves that God doesn't hate lilims like those weirdos with signs keep saying" -N
| "So what's the point again of me having my own line??" -X
>"Maybe if you keep complaining without doing anything about it things will change!"
"Why did we upgrade you" -X
| >>754038
>"Neil! Don-"
>Red tries to shout from the background but his voice was promptly cut off by his Alix's as she starts talking.
"I thought you would never ask!"
>"Neil, you fucked up."
>Alix goes into a long-winded explanation about the book, which, while could be fairly interesting to an average nerd and bookworms, most likely went over Neil's head with all the tropes and references.
| >>754102
"yeah, totally you see I love this part when they--"
>Neil's internment interest shows as his attention only last seconds before switching back to another line or idle activity until the second caller hung.
"yeah and that too, do you- ok shut up please, you're not giving me the full book now, are you? You should give everyone something left to read so they buy it Alix!"
| >>754184
>"Unsurprisingly, line '555' is busy for the moment! If you'd like, press '2' for line '545' or try again later!"
| "'unsurprisingly' Real humble we are bein' with the respond messages" -X
>"Do you want one like that too? It'd be silly since you never need it"
"Please stop" -X
| >>754467
"Oh, of course. This is just a general explanation of what how I came up with the plot and how the story evolves over the course of me writing and revising it."
>Alix continues, despite the explicit request to shut up. She seems to be talking directly to the people listening to the radio on the next part.
"If this feels like something you would be interested in, you can find my book at my website, TerraPublishing. Except Neil, I'll send one over to you if you want."
| >>754520
"Well since we now got the attention of all fine gentlemen who can't seem to stop being lame I'll accept your offer and take one copy of your book Alix, I shall be a king among nerds from receiving this gift of yours"
>Neil said humbly yet dishonestly
| >>754921
"Alright, as long as you stop insulting my readers because one's right here beside me and I need his support otherwise my writing career might be over."
>"Wait, why would your career be over?"
"Because I would rather stop writing than have you leave me again."
>"Really?"
"Yeah, I-"
>Alix abruptly stops as she caught herself flirting once again.
"Sorry, I got carried away."
| >>754941
"Don't worry I puked just a little, who can get in the way of young love anyway? The answer is me"
>A loud tap on the mic muffled Neil's last words before fixing itself back
"Now for the life of me I can't get into this book but I'm proud you were smart enough to use this free advertising time on air"
| >>755204
"I'll take that as a compliment, thanks."
>Alix replies, smugly. You could almost hear her straightening her back after the previous sheepish reply. She clears her throat to prepare to move on to the next topic.
"Now, as you seems to deem yourself a very... uh, 'classy' person. Do you know any good place for a dinner date?"
| >>755222
"well you flatter me like everyone else does, but unfortunately for you I'm more of a 'your house or mine' kinda guy so let's ask the expert here, Xii" -N
"What" -X
"Rumors say you've been seen out with a certain young girl lately, where do you take her for dinners?" -N
>A small pause with tension forms before a response is made
"..Ya' got it all wrong Neil, but if you want my opinion on a classy place I'd hands down recommend the hazy moonlighter" -X
| >>755566
"Oh! Isn't that where Impulse take Valentine when he asked her out?"
>"They went there? Impossible, no way a Brit and a French can ever be in the same place without a fight hapoening."
"Uh, hello? Red, we're Canadian. We are the living proof that a Brit and a French can co-exist. But yeah, they went there, I'll have to ask them about what happened though."
>"Yeah, I'll ask."
| >>755600
"Oh man I forgot you guys are from the 'eh-team', no wonder you never get angry at the shit I say! Wasn't impulse like an OP military agent or something? The fact alone that he was good at that kiiinda counts him out as a French on that matter" - N
| >Call on 535-XXXXXX
| >>755606
"Eh-team? What's that supposed to mean."
>"No, dude, Impulse's my fucking boss. Well, he's also my best friend. Look, I know those two words aren't meant to be together, but we are a weird bunch."
| >>755612
>California picks line '535'.barely giving it any time to ring
>"Hello hello and welcome welcome! You're now live on Radio Wire: place of the good, the bad and the cute. May I ask who's blessing or damming us with their presence today?"
| >>755613
"You know, how bunch of you guys talk up north, eh?"
>Neil's attention like always shifts aimlessly
"No no there's nothing weird with befriending your boss, my boss and I are both inseparable, did you know he considers me the son he could never have due to his size and aspect?"
"You're about to become the employee I never hired" -R
| >>755705
>A feminine voice responds on the other side of the call, it's a crisp voice, filled with youthful energy.
>It's also completely lacking any discernable accent, speaking in that 'international' way the elites who spent time and money learning phonetics often do.
"Hello, yes is this working?"
>A few taps are heard on the receiver
| >>755706
>"Yeah, no, I'm convinced. You two are probably comparable to eachother."
>You can hear Red giggling a little after that.
| >>755708
"Yes I--"
>"--Ah! Sorry for that. It is indeed working and you're now talking with California, third most famous host of all Radio Wire, your presence is welcome and your intentions will sure be!"
>Her voice toned down a bit from her usual hyper-excited to match more of the one calling, mistakenly copying it to perfection at first.
| >>755711
"I keep saying that! If only he listened I could turn him into a pussy magnet in no time, there's so much potential in such a small vessel" -N
"Neil" -R
> "R"'s voice was none the happier
| >>756037
>"Yeah... you two compliment each other well. It's like, who was it? Jekyl and Hyde?"
"Red, Jekyl and Hyde are the same person."
>"Are they?"
"Weren't you paying attention when I read it to you?"
>"You caught me, I was busy thinking about how cute you are."
"...that's not-"
>"You realize how distracting your beautiful face and your soft voices are?"
>You can hear a big sigh.
"Why do I keep letting you get away with this..."
| >>756045
"So when will I get dragged into the action too? I was hesitant at first but I can feel the tension and I'm finally ready to say yes, I'll have a threesome with you guys" -N
>???
| >>756126
>"I have never been turned off so quickly and completely before, holy shit."
>Red's voice was a mix of confusion and amazement.
"Neil, I won't make Red shoot you, yet. Still, no, that's not going to happen."
| >>756146
"You're welcome, you're very welcome, I can see you two don't have too much French in your veins. I did warn you about being happy though, didn't I? I wanted some of that emanating love too" -N
| >>756035
"Ah, good, sorry I just have this habit to check the microphone every time, even though its a good receiver and all that, I just do it you see"
>The voice on the other side explains rapidly
| >>756177
>You can hear Alix gasps.
"Oh, we're so sorry, we must have been very rude. I should have known we weren't paying you enough attention. We must look so self-absorbed."
>Red is giggling, but Alix snaps at him.
"Red! This isn't funny. Neil, how has your day been? Have life been treating you well?"
| >>756290
>"Oh that's ok, it is important to be clear with each other even if we're talking about the signal on which we communicate, don't you agree?"
| >>756295
"no no no listen I do NOT have abandonment issues ok? So don't imply that" -N
"whoa Neily" -X
"I'm just taking in consideration how much sweet we can put on air, and boy you guys sure emanate sugar" -N
| >>756404
>"I'm surprised you didn't do the maple syrup thing again, but then it's getting a bit cliche, isn't it."
"Yeah, Red's being more flirty than usual today, I hope we aren't doing something out of line for your show."
>"It will be fine, I'm sure people love the lovey-dovey kind of shit. Besides, she really is a great girlfriend."
"Yep, definitely more flirty than usua-"
>She was cut off by what can safely be assumed as a kiss.
"-can't say I hate it though..."
| >>756449
"eeeh I'm just trying to appeal to our demographics to be brutally honest, people within a relationship happy with the life they have don't tend to listen to Radio, our calls mostly consist of losers and weirdos" -N
"Disclaimer, Neil sucks" -X
| >>756401
"I do! It's of the utmost importance!"
>She seems happy someone understands this
"You see, back in 68' I was sent to the Florida keys to resolve a dispute between two triple-A class Corporations who were on the verge of terminating several contracts with one another! You can imagine this was a big deal, especially considering the size of both players."
>She says, rapidly, with a crisp tone
| >>756456
"Right, because you asking whether my book is an erotica fits your demographic but not actual relationships."
>Alix replies, clearly amused.
|
| >>756541
>"Oh I can imagine, it surely takes someone who knows their way around negotiations to get things in order, though it must have been quite the pressure on you if they were as big as you're making them sound"
>Her tone is of actual interest, an emotion hard to show on a less-than-human voice
| >>756551
"look man there's this thing called hypocrisy, if my interests are at benefit I'll break every rule to get that erotica, for the other my viewers are getting sprinkled with smooches all over and I get nothing in return" -N
>The less sense he made the more philosophical he sounded
"Now If you liked to donate with each of your calls I'll personally play the violin, shut my mouth and hold the candles for you" -N
| >>756802
"Well... I do have an erotica I wrote up for myself... if you are interested."
>Alix replies, almost teasingly.
>"Honey, please don't."
>Red sounds nervous and... scared? That's unsual.
| >>756800
"That's right, communication was very important! But the way we actually figured out the problem didn't come from my negotiations alone! You see the problem was actually related to an issue with microphone units, my good aide and scribe Marianne was the one who figured it out!"
>She laughs loudly, reminiscing
"The microphone linking supervisors from one company was routing them to the dockworkers from the other, causing a big misunderstanding!"
| Yeah
| >>756806
"Now in any other context I'd be wary of your tone but if I can get erotica *and* make a Canadian suffer while at that then sign me the fuck up, I already don't care how bad it is send me your grossest, nastiest--
>A constant beep is manually ringed to cut off Neil on the spot until he's done talking
| >>756808
>"Ooooh, so the importance of the signal and its way of transmission *was* your issue back then! So many would give so much to be on that position, getting a handle of such a big situation yet still being so humble as to credit your companion's input"
>California's welcoming aura never seemed to leave her side
| >>757155
>"Alix, honey, have I told you how beautiful you look today?"
>There was panic in Red's voice.
"Thank you."
>"Yeah, you would be even more beautiful if you don't send *that* to him."
"Hmm... I don't know honey, should I not?"
>You could almost hear Alix smiling through her teasing tone.
>"Please, I'll do anything."
"Anything?"
| >>757156
"Indeed! And that's the explanation for my odd habit from earlier, I'd rather look like an idiot for a moment than be caught by faulty communications!"
>She says, chuckling
"Ah, but sorry about that, I just started prattling off like that... I never did introduce myself; I am Karin Schaffield, Representative of Seol Recovery: We specialize in Odd jobs and helping corporate assets get in touch with their lower elements."
>She sounds proud of her position.
|
|
| >>757162
"Make him surrender, that will be very French out of him but please do after you send me what you wrote. Don't let THE MAN dictate what you can or cannot do lady, be your own woman and send me it for God's sake!" -N
| >>757198
>"Well it's more than nice to meet you Mrs. Schaffield, why is someone with such a status calling our humble station today? We don't really have good experiences with the high class, you should see the crew's faces fight now"
>There was a tone of amusement accompanied with a small giggle at the lilim's last remark
| >>757554
>"You are also a man, Neil."
>Red points out. Alix, isn't exactly convinced, but goes along with it anyways.
"Hmm... he does have a poin- Red! Stop! You know I'm ticklish!"
>Alix's sentence turns into giggles.
>"Don't send him that, pretty please with sugar on top?"
"Stop tickling me! Alright, give me a kiss on top and we have a dea-"
>The kiss is given before she could even finished.
"Sorry Neil, seems I have more French blood than him, my granny was from Quebec."
| >>757556
"Well, you see, I've been really interested in this radio show lately, part of a small job; our client apparently liked the programming despite their position, told me a few stories and I just had to call!"
>Karin says, excitedly
"I have to ask... did your radio host *really* talk to a ghost?"
|
| >>757557
"no no it's fine"
>Said Neil with an exaggerated sarcasm
"Not the first time a French has blue balled me anyway; do you think I could get one of those too, though? Red sounds like a great kisser and daddy Neil wants some sugar too"
| >>757569
>"Well we cannot deny nor confirm such allegations--"
>Cali said with such a professional tone as she was getting interrupted
"--Quote the guidelines again and I'll whip your hard drive, tell her about Polly!" -N
>"...But exceptions can be made. Yes, while we offered shelter for a group of lilims during one of the many riots one didn't exactly show in physical form you see, yet of all of us Neil was the one who was able to see her"
| >>757976
"No! Red is mine! He can gives you a hug, but not a kiss."
>Alix sounds kind of territorial and... angry? Well, as angry as she ever sounds, that is.
"Besides, I thought you are a 'pussy magnet' and all that. Don't you already have plenty of kisses in your life?"
>You can probably hear Red snickering and planting another kiss on the girl's cheek if you listen closely.
| >>757979
"Wow! so it was real!"
>The woman sounds ecstatic
"Tell me, are there other stories like this? exotic stories?"
>Her excitement is contagious
| >>757986
"I mean what's a magnet good for if you don't pick everything that sticks to it? Canadian pennies are still pennies and sadly I'm not allowed to bring companions in with me during transmissions, isn't that just fucked? I literally could be naked right now and no one could tell" -N
"Oh we could tell" -R
| >>758045
>"oh you have no idea!"
>seemed like her tone sorta dropped the elegance she was trying to mimic
>"One time we got this call from a group of cowgirls that only moo'ed into the mic!"
"Alleged cowgirls" -X
>"Xii was all over them and I had to translate once we figured they were using morse!"
"Alleged 'over them'" -X
| >>758178
"That's beside the point, you should already have your own source of kisses. I'm not giving Red up."
>"Can you guys stop objectifying me. I'm still here, you know?"
>Red sounds slightly annoyed.
"Sorry."
| >>758181
"Wow, Cowgirls? As in, half cow hybrids?"
>She sounds impressed
"They simply, just, moo'ed in morse code? How novel! My employer wasn't lying, this IS a great program! Better than the sorts we get at headquarters anywho!"
| >>758186
"I'm sorry too, eh? As a person who's constantly being objectified due to his movie star looks and stunning personality I can feel your struggle Red, we're brothers in object now" -N
| >>758187
>"Well like no others do we take pride in our incompetence~"
"No we don't" -R
>"This kind of content comes from humble places almost exclusively, mainstream shows or stations are not exactly the place most of our callers would like to show at; there's some charm on being close to the spotlight while not quite under it, you know?"
| >>758516
>"...yeah I'm going to pretend you didn't say that."
"...anyways, look, the point is, you know my views on sharing partners, and as far as I'm concerned, kissing is included in that."
>Alix argues.
"That is final. He's not kissing anyone else... well maybe if we get married and have a baby, then that will be fine~"
>She sounds increasingly happier as she mentions her future plans.
| >>758524
"God you guys are adorable, like a trashcan full of kittens or a choir boy who *just* turned 18. What is your secret for staying so happy all the damn time? Last time I had something serious with someone things ended.. Not pretty, and that's coming from me" -N
| >>758776
"Well, I'm sorry to hear that."
>"I'm going to go ahead and say that he probably deserved it."
"Red!"
>"What?"
"Just... nevermind. Anyways Neil, you know we broke up once."
>"You broke up with me."
"*We* broke up once. *We* can *both* agree that that's a mistake and that it's not going to happen again, right?"
>"Okay, fine, that one's true. I missed you so damn much when you were gone."
"Aww, I missed you so much too."
| >>758519
"I do understand that, It's also why our company does good business, sometimes the spotlight is a bit too bright for some people, it takes an intermidiary to step within for some!"
>She laughs
"You said earlier that "corporate" kinds didn't call too often, do you have usual callers then? Other than cows and ghosts of course!"
| >Call on 545-XXXXXXX
| >>758779
"Whoa guys come on I have *feelings* ok?? I'm not just another radio sociopath lacking empathy and common decency"
>Once again Neil's exaggerated tone was not too convincing
"I wanna know which one of you fucked up tho, who did a fucky wucky that made the other leave? My money is on Red"
| >>758799
>"Actual people are not much better for we've had our fair share of freaks, weirdos and.. Perverts"
>She cleared her throat despite not really having the biological need to do so
>"The odd ones tend to the funniest though! We had this woman with the voice of a child call by accident sometimes; a caller that would drop secret messages and leave; an energetic guy that spoke way too fast too! But I try not to mention him for Neil always drinks 'to his memory' when we do so"
| >>758834
>Xii picks up line '545' right as it started ringing
"Hello and welcome to Radio Wire, the healthy alternative to the many voices that live in your head. You're now talking with Xii, pronounced like 'Xii' and pronouncin' a welcome to you, who do we have the pleasure to welcome in today?"
| >>759018
>"Doubtful."
"Anyways, I think it was more like we both kinda strayed away from each other because of our jobs. I broke first and left him."
>"...and it hurted so fucking badly, getting dumped over text."
"I regretted it too, okay? We're back together now."
>"Apology accepted."
"Can we cuddle up? Talking about that already made me a little depressed."
>"Me too, come here."
| >>759022
"Ya got that right..." >A somewhat familiar feminine voice fills the headset.
"...but how did ya know that I had voices in my head?"
"It's Mer-"
"..."
"...J."
| >>759023
"isn't that how you're supposed to break up though? Why go through all that emotional turnout when you can just be professional and text them 'hey, it's over'. Really saves you a lot of time too if you think about it" -N
"Jesus Christ" -R
| >>759031
"Don't we all? If it ain't the shit they put on prosthetics it's the subliminal trash we absorb through TV"
>Xii picks up quite quick but curiousity is the tone that prevails now
"So, 'J'.. ever been told your name's like one from an energy drink? Sounds like it to me now"
| >>759019
"Wait, did you also get prank calls from a kid who said she was a police officer?"
>The lady sounds shocked, you can hear her mutter "I thought that was only us"
| >>759071
"Neil, if your dating life is professional, then that's not a dating life. That's prostitution."
>"Yeah, that's kinda fucked up."
| >>759104
"So it seems to me, y'know? Definetly somethin' ah'd put on a can, maybe with a 9 next to it.. Is it nostalgia what brings ya' to our station today? Many people miss the times when Radio was popular" -X
| "if his fucking accent gets stronger again I'm gonna go mental" -N
| >>759114
>"She-she often asked if we had candy or cookies, and we figured she barely reached the numbers on the phone whenever she dialed, always claiming she called in by accident.."
| >>759175
"I mean my dating life has revolved around prostitution since I set foot on Glitch City, have any of you ever been with an NSF android? People must be really lonely here cause the absolute quality of the street lilims doesn't even compare, it's surreal guys, surreal" -N
| >>759315
"Nostalgia... nnnhh.. ah guess."
>A beat.
"Nostalgic fer a lotta things, ya know? Feels like only yesterday ah be dialing inta dis thing fer da first time."
"Ah don't even remember the last, honestly. Days gon' by in a rush when ah took fer granted that everythang'd end in a mess."
"Well, 'ey ain't. Feels like things ended and that's that."
>A sniffle?
"...an, well, it sucks ya kno?"
"Sorry, prolly not makin' a whole lotta sense at the moment."
| >>759319
"Wow, I'd believe by now she would of gotten a stool or something to look at the dial... We also get calls from her every so often"
>Karin sounds sympathetic
| >>759320
>"So you don't have a dating life since you set foot here."
"Wanna tell us what happened last time you have a dating life?"
|
| >>759330
"...Ah' think I understand-" -X
"I sure as hell don't" -N
"ya' live most of yer' life runnin' from somethin' and suddenly there's no more somethin' and no more runnin' and ya' either miss it or don't know how to live without it" -X
>A small pause follows
"How much of that did I get right?" -X
| >>759339
>"Part of me wants to believe she's an officer in her 30's you know? You get so many callers of so many different types.. She also was so very convincing"
| >>759372
"well it's been a while so let's see, uh.. Ok ground rules first, does it count if she charged me monthly? At that point is more of a contract than a casual deal" -N
| >>759742
"What? No way! You don't just prank call in your thirties!"
>Karin laughs, suddenly a sound can be heard in the background
>A voice, very faint
>"Isn't it what you're doing right now Schaffield, get back to work!"
>Karin yelps
"Oh, uh, sorry sir! Sorry I have to bolt! Can you just answer one last question?"
>She says, in a hurry
| >>759738
"..." >Silence.
"...Hell." >The voice croaks, accent ever so slightly different from normal.
"...dat's exactly on point, chummer." >She says.
| >>759770
"Well that's not fair, either way.. Following that stupid rule of yours I'd say what happened last time is she eventually found out I left Neo San Fran' and moved on, or at least I hope she did for her own sake. I kinda broke all contacts when I left" -N
| >>759773
>"Sure can, ask away! You've been so kind and is also literally my job so I'll answer whatever at this point"
| >>759785
"We all need somethin' to move forwards sugar.. Maybe this time chase for somethin' rather than be chased for a change? Some fools retire, some go berserk and burn down clinics.. others open radio stations, talk about givin' up huh?" -X
"Uncalled for" -R
| >>760355
"Alright! How is it that you keep getting called by someone who says He's >>>the CN, I mean... Is that a LARPer or something? Whenever I listened to your archives I would always laugh at first but then he sounded so... Uh, serious?"
>Karin asks, she sounds extremely curious about this.
>She's definitely referring to DYNAMOFORCE too.
| >>760356
"Chase, rather than be chased huh..."
>The voice on the other line says, thoughtfully...
"...well."
"Any idea for a target?"
| >>760357
"I mean it was her heart or my legs, I wouldn't ask you if you'd break both legs for each other cause your sweet asses would both say yes and then kiss or something" -N
"You could have called her" -R
"YoU cOuLd HaV--No one asked" -N
| >>760374
>"Weeeell.."
>And she trails off way too long with that 'well'
>"I don't know if this fits within our rules of anonymity from each caller since he never really seems to care but.. That *was* the CN, he's even visited the station before in some of our old locations, he himself introduced me to the matrix too!"
| >>760462
"Are we-Are we talkin' people or places? If we're talkin' people ah' really couldn't point at anyone y'know? How would Radio Wire look if I said somethin' like the corrupt heads of the GCPD or the elites who still benefit from that sweet Corp money? Ah' couldn't tell ya' any of that!"
| >The mic gets cut off for a few seconds then functions back like if nothing happened
"-Now if we're talkin' places.. Just don't open *another* bar like everyone else does, maybe a hotel or an arcade yanno'? Ya' seem like the hotel kind to me, only that you could be the boss rather than the employee ya' see.." -X
| >>760738
"Yeah, Neil, call her right now on the call. There's a chance you'll win her back!"
>"Very slim chances, especially after all this time, but you wouldn't be a total dick, maybe."
"Red! We're his friends, we gotta be supportive!"
| >>760741 >>760742
"A hotel eh..." >The voice sounds thoughtful.
"... a shame the last place we had went up in smoke. Might'a thought about it then, y'know."
| >>760740
"He's real? Oh you mean his actor or something?"
>Karin is confused but her voice remains peppy.
>"Will you get back to work already you idiot!! I'm not paying you to screw around!"
>A voice says in the background, louder this time
"Eeek! Apologies Calli but I have to go now!!"
>The call cuts
| >>760750
"Ok ok whoa let's backpedal here, or better yet, let's go full reverse on this topic, guys"
>And Neil inhales, the unstoppable force when it comes to testing patience taking a deep breath
"I'm done with her, ok?
| (Unfinished message, give me a sec)
| >>760750
"Ok ok whoa let's backpedal here, or better yet, let's go full reverse on this topic, guys"
>And Neil inhales, the unstoppable force when it comes to testing patience taking a deep breath
"I'm done with her, ok? It's been year-years and I've moved on, do I think of her? yes cause I'm not a sociopath, but I'm not gonna call one of my many exes after so long without any contact. First, she'll tell me to fuck off. Second, I don't want to!"
| >>760966
"Okay, fine, jeez. How about you tell us about those other 'many exes' instead?"
>"Still, you never know. Me and Alix didn't have any contact for a long time. Maybe you'll get someone back finally."
| >Call on line 535
| >>760764
"Well ya' say that, but to me it sounds like the city lost one hotel and could use another.. There's other options of course, an arcade, a restaurant, even a laundry if ya' got the right clientele, ya' know how people open donuts shops in front of police stations? Maybe a laundry in front of some fancy gated community" -X
>There's some thoughtful pause after the recommendations
"A shootin' range? God knows the people in this city can't aim for shit" -X
| >>760772
>"See ya! you're welcome to call again sometime!"
"They hung--" -R
>"--They listen to the station father, they might hear it after"
| >>760975
"I've tried chrome my dude, maybe I'll upgrade to lilim next time"
>Neil cleared his throat, then gulped some water before continuing
"My exes, that's a long topic.. There was one that found out I had the hots for her mom so she got all offended like it wasn't natural, you know? Another one had this stupid southern accent that I swear if she wasn't so good in bed--" -N
"--Wanna finish that phrase? Come on do it" -X
"..This one's also Xii's sister I should mention" -N
| >>760986
>California picks up line '535' almost instinctively
>"Hello, you have dialed Radio Wire! One of the last bastions of free speech ran by the worst people qualified for such responsibility! What might your name be and how do you intend to treat us today?"
| >>761001
>"What!?"
>Looks like the 'had the hots for her mother' part made Red spit out whatever liquid he had in his mouth.
"Neil! You really shouldn't try to have sex with your partner's mother! That's definitely not natural."
>"No wonder nobody dates you, jesus. I know I said this a lot already - all for good reasons by the way - that's really fucked up."
| >>760999
"Hah! Ah could do with a shooting range- outta practice after relying on smartlinks fer so long."
"Ah think we still had a little eatery somewhere, too. Should probably go about cleaning that up..."
| >>761002
"Hello, yes, I would like to have two ice cream shakes please!"
>It's a child's voice, complete with a lisp...
>It's her again.
| >>761009
"Look I didn't TRY ok? The urge was just there and she picked up on it! You know girls have some sort of sixth sense or something and, let me tell you, it is completely natural according to this frodo guy!" -N
"Again, Freud" -R
| >>761082
"Who says you can't have many places runnin' too? If ya' got the capital and the guts ah'd say go for it, people learn to respect someone whose name is on many places, and God knows owners have to do nothin' but sit back and collect money" -X
| >>761106
>"Well speak of the devil and she'll show up hello there you!"
>She spoke to her with that extra-cheery tone most people uses with children, coming off a little too extra being Cali the one trying it
>"This is still not a candy store Missy, you got the wrong number!"
| >>761398
>There's a grumble on the other end of the receiver.
"Somehow I knew this would happen..."
>She says in her cute voice, before sighing
"I get it... you."
>A beat, and she inhales
"YOU TAPPED INTO MY PHONE DIDN'T YOU!!! TO KEEP ME FROM EATING CANDY!!! YOU'RE PART OF THE DENTISTS AREN'T YOU!!!!"
| >>761395
>"Yeah, no, Freud was really weird. Like, dude invented fucking therapy."
"I don't have a sixth sense, at least I don't think so."
>"I think you do, you just haven't got a chance to use it yet."
"Because you're always faithful?"
>"Right on!"
| >>761399
>"Aww did the dentist forbid you from eating more candy? You should listen to them! You've spent so many calls asking for them, I can't imagine how much you've had this far!"
| >>761401
"Most I know about Freud is that his sidekick through all his works was cocaine so that's a role model to me. Can you imagine being the best at what you do while high off your entire ass? Dude could probably find out what the brain was made of if given enough time" -N
| >>761932
>"Dude, Nazis were using crystal meth in WW2. Using drugs is not a reason to make a model of somebody."
"Using drugs should probably have the opposite effect, but this is Neil so."
>"Took the words right out of my mouth."
| >>761931
"I KNEW IT!! YOU'RE A DENTIST!! ALSO I DIDNT HAVE TOO MUCH!! And... I brush thrice a day! But my teeth keep ripping apart the toothbrushes!! Its a ploy to get me to buy more of them! Dentists are evil!"
>The little girl says, fuming
| >>761964
"Yeah Nazis were also drinking water, if we're going go use that card I'll dare say to nazis were also very passionate lovers too with their Nazi flirts and Nazi ideas of the future-" -N
"-Can you please stop saying 'Nazi' for God's sake" -R
"Sorry, my point is: Champions use drugs" -N
"I will disconnect your mic" -R
| >>761992
>"Oooh do you have strong little girl teeth then?"
>At this point this would seem like teasing, if it came from literally anyone else
>"I'm no dentist but I know a growing person must brush their teeth regularly!"
| >>762092
>"That wasn't the intended moral of the story, but hey, good to know that Neil's a Nazi sympathizer as well."
"Didn't realize Americans could sympathize with Nazis."
| >>761396
"Eh, that just sounds like a pain in the ass now." >The voice responds dreamily.
"...or maybe heaven. Ah don't know. You have any businesses or whatever?"
| >>762129
"NO look-"
>The mic cut off all of sudden, only to be hastily connected again
"I am NOT a Nazi sympathizer Jesus fuck are you guys journalists or something to twist my words like that?? What I'm saying is you can't compare literally anything to the Nazis to win an argument, they did all the shit we also do minus the genocide and I swear I'm as American as an unnecessary war and I *will* reach through the line to your maple-swallowing neck if you call me a Nazi again!"
| >>762133
"Nah, boss here does since Radio was gonna be 'the first of many', but plans changed so we live off donations and contracts. I'm just thinkin' what kinda stuff someone retired would do" -Xii
>A pause, as he finished with uncertainty
"Ah' mean.. You are retired, right?" -Xii
| >>762093
"I'm not little! I'm still growing!"
>The girl grumbles
"My teeth are super sharp!! They can cut through steel!!!"
>You hear a loud, dull noise, she's obviously opening and closing her mouth rapidly... to prove her point or... something
| >>762163
>"What? That's what it sounds like. We pointed out that Nazis use drugs, you said champions use drugs. So the conclusion, you think Nazis are champions."
"Come on Neil, you kinda walked into that one."
|
| >>762211
>"Oh I'm sure they can! I know humans at your age can be very imaginative, but maybe if you ate a little less sugar you wouldn't have to worry about the dentists!"
>Absolutely delighted would perfectly describe Cali's mood right now
| >>762230
"nonononono you listen here my point is you can literally bring up Nazis to any discussion to immediately win, that's low guys and that's me saying it" -N
"So is cancelin' people still a thing? Ah' feel like there's a lot of ammo for that here" -X
| >>762840
"Alright, alright, let's change the subject before you start saying you have a thing for your cousin."
>Alix chuckles.
| >>762837
"I NEED the sugar though..."
>The voice says, trailing off
"Also, I'M NOT AT "YOUR AGE" I'M.. huh, how old am I again??"
>A beat, the sound of rustling clothes and a wallet opening.
>A card sliding out right next to the receiver.
"What year is it again... oh right!!! I'M 36!!"
| >>762874
"Oh ew no no, I can assure you I'm the only hot one of my cousins, everyone else looks like a chernobyl accident compared to me, not to mention I'm from from NSF and not Alabama" -N
| >>762997
>"Aw is that your mommy's wallet you got with you? You shouldn't be snooping with documents from the adults like that or they won't get you any more candy!"
| >>763181
"Guh! My mom doesn't live here I live alone!!"
>There's some tapping on the other side of the line as the lisping voice makes her point clear.
>She's either jumping on her seat or slamming her tiny fist unto a table, it's hard to tell though.
"I'm an Adult! I was born in the 40's! How old are YOU??"
| >>763180
>"Oh right, it runs in the family. Bet the rest of your cousins also say that."
"Actually, I think we should go now. We'll talk to you later."
>Line cuts
| >>762210
"Hell... retirement. Never thought about it to be honest."
"Ah guess ah'm kinda... semi-retired? Had a few good reasons fer it, at one point. Free agent again, unfortunately."
| >>763233
>"I'm like 2 years old, technically! But mentally I'm old enough to tell you need some supervision young lady!"
| >>763265
"Man fuck Canadians, at least I'm not a product of British women and French men" -N
"I think they hung up" -R
"Shut the hell up I know" -N
| >>763439
"I mean.. there ain't nothin' too bad 'bout going freelancin'. Ah've been like that for a while before Radio and there's some freedom in bein' independent" -X
This thread is permanently archived
| >"RADIO WIRE, REESTABLISHING CONNECTION"
\
>"STATUS: CONNECTED"
\
>"NUMBERS"
>"555-XXXXXX MAIN LINE RAN BY NEIL"
>"545-XXXXXXX SECONDARY LINE RAN BY XII"
>"535-XXXXXX COMPLEMENTARY LINE RAN BY CALIFORNIA"
>"515-XXXXXX 'PRVT' BUSINESS LINE"
\
>"MUSIC, NEWS, EVENTS. 24/7"