This thread is permanently archived
[Radio] Radio Wire 13.75
| "Hello hello and hello again everyone if you can hear this it probably means your radio is broken and you can't change the channel, or in simpler words: Radio Wire!" -N
| "I also have an issue with you listener because who in their right mind still owns a radio? It's the current year guys we use the little chips inside our heads!" -N
"I'm not talking about me of course, there is nothing inside my head" -N
"Tell us somethin' we don't know" -X
| "You know there's also phones right? And computers, we have the online frequency and that.." -X
"Honestly I also have a problem with anyone using their internet for this, all I do is talk none-sense non-stop and somehow people end up donating to us, like what's the catch here?" - N
| "That some people really like to hear us? Sometimes people just support the artists they enjoy" -X
"'Artists' is kind of a stretch" -R
"No no he's got a point.. when I was younger I used to donate to this Webcam girl, and if she called that art then we're in for an Oscar" -N
| "Can you try to not be so.. Disgusting all the time?" -X
"Hey you know I could be more explicit, but there is a little girl with us now" -N
>"Wha-I'm not a little girl!"
"No I was talking about R but.. I like the way you think about yourself" -N
| "So mature" -R
"I know right? She's almost a woman now, one day--" -N
"--Don't.." -R
"Oh boy but R, the whiteboard says ya' want a new hot topic to get people hooked, and Lilims *are* pretty popular" -X
| "I know what you guys are doing and we're not talking about this" -R
>"Why don't you want to talk about me father?"
"T-That's not--" -R
"Stage 1, he's stuttering" -N
| "You're not getting me on my nerves here and we--" -R
"--Are just talking about your greatest invention, Cali how old are you again?" -N
>"An average 17. Father doesn't think it's necessary to increase my maturity"
"Cali do NOT-" -R
"Stage 2, he's yelling!" -N
| "C'mon R this is yer' hot topic, why are ya' keepin' this girl so young on purpose?" -X
"This is some frodo Bullshit right here" -N
"that's.. Ya' mean Freud, right?" -X
| "I do NOT need to answer to you two" -R
"That girl's messin' with her own circuits for like a year now though" -X
"That's because her original AI comes from an open source software while her maturity is a whole new program, probably made by R" -N
| "what the fuck" -X
"Hard to break what dictates the way you react to everything, you know? Specially when it's behind who knows how many encryptions" -N
"How the hell do ya' know so much??“ -X
"Big Neil knows his girls, wink wink" -N
"I need to sit down.." -R
| >Calls on line 555
| >"... Why haven't I been upgraded past my age father? I have so more knowledge than when this started"
"And touchdown! good luck with that, R" -N
"What is.. Oh right, we're a radio" -N
| >>589493
>Neil picks up line '555'
"Hola, donde esta la biblioteca?
..PSYCH! Hello and welcome to Radio Wire, you're now talking with the most important man of all GC along with some unimportant others" -N
"Well fuck you too" -X
"Now who do I have the pleasure to talk with now?" -N
| >>589568
>On the line is a rough voice
"Oh, sorry buddy I thought this is the call for pizza place. Haven't called the damn place in so long"
>Then he starts murmuring
"Where's that damn number, this is the forth one I called"
>The line cuts
| "Well that was Hella anticlimactic, most disappointing seconds of my life" -N
"Name of Neil's leaked sex tape" -X
| >Call 535-XXX-XXXX
| >>589832
>California picks up line '535'
>"Hello and welcome to Radio Wire! They call me Cali and I do not want to be here! Luckily I'm committed to stay longer to make your day dear listener, what name do you go by?"
| "Did anyone else found that kind of creepy?" -X
"I found it kind of hot" -N
>A deep breath followed the talk, ending in an exhausted exhale
| >>590110
>"Oh hi CN! I've been doing so great recently, despite the obvious conflict of interests going on in here I've managed to stay cheerful!"
"It's almost like she can only feel that one emotion" -N
| :0
| >>590116
"Conflicts of interest? Have the three stooges been nonstop fighting as always then? I'm sure that must be rough on you at times."
| >>590153
>"You have no idea, father is more stressed than usual and Neil.. Well, Neil is being very Neil like always, at least Xii knows how to handle things around"
"Professional wrangler here for anyone hirin'" -X
| >>590200
"Guys, you three have been at this for *multiple* years by now, cant you get along yet? At least well enough to teach Cali via example a little bit better than... whatever that was when you went on the air."
| "That-" -X
"-That was an attempt to open shortie's or his creation mind about that weird frankestein style relationship they have going on- We need to pop Cali out of that 'Inside is safe-Everyhing is perfect-Let's never grow up' bubble R has her in" -N
>"You people are horrible"
| >>590220
"If that's your goal then you're failing. Horribly. If Cali's response is any indication. Call it what you want but you just sound like dicks right now. Get your drek together guys, despite your intentions Cali needs some respect. Whether any of you three believe or not, shes her own being."
| >>590223
"Okay look I know this doesn't look good but-" -X
"-The thing is--" -N
"--Shut up, for the love of god just.. Now. CN, ya' know we love that girl and ah' know ah' shouldn't listen to Neil but.. He said there was a chance to make them realize what's wrong with 'em and god damn me he was convincin'" -X
"Don't blame the planner, blame the plan" -N
| >>590224
"How about I blame you both, simple as that? Maybe the guilt will make you realize to think a little bit harder on your next 'plan's. If you got a problem how they are then bring it up to R but dont make it a deal with Cali now. Shes doing her best from what shes learned."
| >Call on line 555-XXX-XXX
| >>590230
"Oh what a great idea, why didn't I though of that before?" -X
>"Enough with your sarcasm he's trying to help"
"...Sorry, I talk to R on every opportunity I got but he's as stubborn as a mule" -X
| >>590231
>Neil picks up line '555'
"Hello and welcome to DR.Neil's show, aka Radio Wire or that station where they're always screaming at each other, maybe my psychologist was right on that thing.. Oh right, the call! who do I have the pleasure to talk with now?"
| >>590240
>A thick, Scottish accents awaits for you at the other end of the line
"So, I was listenin' tae th' conversation wi' th' esteemed sir oan th' othar line, an' I was wonderin' if I coods gie ye somewhat at an input oan yer... 'parentin' issue', let's say... Is it alrecht?"
| >>590242
"Oh god I-"
>Neil broke down on laughter, trying his best at holding back but failing horribly
"I-I'm sorry man but-oh god you're worse than him, I.. S-Sure man all advice is welcome" -M
| -N*
| >>590238
"Then R you're partly at fault to. I know you all dont get along all the time but you got to talk with them about some of this stuff if Cali is going to be influenced as much by them. This stuff is important."
| .
.
.
"He's talkin' to you R don't be shy, maybe two hackers think alike" -X
"I said I wasn't talking about this and I'm not changing my mind" -R
"Just becase you size like a kid doesn't mean ya' get to act like one, c'mon you're all about good PR, now you're on live discussin' real personal problems, show some goddamn maturity" -X
>"Watch the swearing too.."
| >>590249
"Worse than 'im? Care tae explain, eh?"
>The scotsman grunts, annoyed by the comment.
"Weel, I was sayin', yer Cali thaur's not a bairn anymore, isnae she? Dornt care if human, lilim, AI ur whatever, there's always a moment when their childhuid ends, ye know? Aam father tae a lassie, an' that moment came fur 'er too..."
| "Th' only thin' ye can do, trust me, is treat 'er wi' th' respect an adult's due. Ye cannae be a nanny forever th' sam way ye cannae keep fuckin' aroond wi' 'er forever. Comes a time when ye just got tae be a guid father, teach 'er how tae knock out a man in a single blaw, how tae doon a pint properly an' all th', ye know, fatherly things, reit? Thaur simply comes a time when ye gotta treat 'er as a peer, an' that's that."
| >>590259
"Oh god man look you make sense and I respect you I swear I do but your accent.. I-Look I'm on your side the biggest problem here is R, right? let's all look at R as the cause of this now that is no longer me" -N
| >>590262
"...I can see you're all concerned but I see no reason for her to age up, one of the perks of technology these days is how that is an option for her, not an obligation, and I believe as the one who created her that the best for her is to remain how she is now"
"Jesus" -X
| >>590264
"...You do realize when something is a choice that means its HER choice right? Shes not just technology, shes a sentient being R, not a doll that you decide all her decisions for. Hell this is why they do benchmark mental tests for care taken lilims. You just sound unnecessary controlling right now."
| >>590267
"I sound the right amount of controlling, it's for her safety and the best for her!" -R
"He's yellin'" -X
"You don't know our situation, if I decide she's not mature enough it's because I know better, I know her better than anyone else.." -R
>"I..."
| >>590269
"As well as her? You cant read the thoughts she has in private. What she wants to do to relax in her alone time, what she values and treasures. Have you even *asked* what she would prefer to do?"
| >>590273
"I know my daughter.. I know this is what she *needs* rather than what she wants, she can have all the fun and freedom she wants indoors, but it's *unnecessary* for her to mature further when all she does is help on the station" -R
"..C'mon girl speak out" -X
| >>590419
"And let me guess, you dont also let her do anything outside of the station because she isn't 'mature' enough right?"
| >>590478
"You're keeping Cali in an idiotic circle of self reasoning R. You're not taking care of her, you're trapping her like that. There comes the time when she has to make her own decisions, its not like she cant ask for your opinions anymore after that. At the very least TALK to her you dolt!"
| >>590482
"I don't have to talk to her to know what she wants, I'm keeping her safe!" -R
"What's the fun in that" -N
>"I-I want to decide what I want.."
"XII please take her out somewhere.." -R
>"NO! I want to hear everything!"
| >>590549
"She is literally trying to open a dialogue with you right now R and you're shutting her out. Just have a conversation with Cali."
| "LADS! COME OAN, LADS! All of ye, stop yellin', an' ye three stop bein' sae damn harsh wi' Maister R here, will ye? He's nae bad cheil and no bad faither either, he's jist tryin' tae dae his best fur Cali, cause he is worried sick abit 'er. How the heel ye think ye can help 'im sort thes out, if th' only thin' ye're daein' is shoutin' at 'im, eh?"
| "An' Maister R, will ye please stop bein' so damn thrawn? Aam a faither too, I get whit ye're dealin' wi', but ye actin' loch thes isnae makin' things easy fur Cali. An' it's personal experience talkin', actin' loch ye can decide everythin' fur 'er, I assure ye, isnae goin' tae wark. An' I know ye're jist worried an' ye want tae protect 'er, but ye have got tae trust 'er and let 'er go a tad. Ye cannae expect 'er tae grow up, if ye're th' one livin' 'er life instead of 'er."
| >>590550 >>590721
"Okay... I understand you people unnecessarily worrying about my daughter-" -R
>"Stop"
"-But I am not making this a public issue, whatever our situation is is private and none of your God. Damn. Business" -R
"That's new.." -X
| >>590820
"*Sigh* Fine, I can't argue with that last point. But I will say this, things arent not going to go well with you two in the long term I'd you keep up this attitude. I know you care but the ends doesnt justify the means."
>Click
| "That was something.." -X
"My plan--" -N
"--Was shit as well as you. And me for listenin'. Cali?" -X
>A door slam interrupts
"understandable" -X
| "So.. Radio Wire people. We got music, news, events and Drama, apparently" -X
"Radio is better than TV, we got all they have without being controlled by a huge corporation" -N
| "There's also the thing that we don't do subliminal messages like TV does" -X
"What are you talking about? TV doesn't do that" -N
"TV has been nothin' but subliminal messages since the 60's" -X
"That sounds like something I'd remember" -N
"No man, *the* 60's" -X
.
.
.
.
"Oh" -N
| >there is a ring on line 555
>and a vague premonition of...cookies and cream?
| "OK now everyone shut up" -N
"No one's talkin'--" -X
"--I said shut up!" -N
>>591126
>Neil picks up line '555'
"Hello and welcome to big fourth letter incorporated, what can we help you with sir or m'am?" -N
| >>591142
>aaaannnnnndddd!
"Helllo!( ・⩌ ・)ﾉ
I hope you are all having a nice day!"
>its the girl that would call with the other guy
>save for neil who recognizes that this is gem
>even through the phone a wave of healing positivity runs through the air!
| >>591143
"Oh God, oh no she's Cute I remember this, Gem?" -N
"So do we still shut up or" -X
"No-Yes, shut up. Gem, how are you girl? How has life been treating you? Though from your everyday tone I'm gonna guess you still live in French wonderland where nothing wrong ever happens" -N
| >>591226
"Hiii mister neil!
Hii mister X!
Hii miss R"
>she greets them each to be as thoughtful as possible
"In still trying to reach for my dreams!
Slowly but steadily!
Now then~ aaahhhh om~"
>the sound of metal hitting glass can be observed as she seems to be eating something
"Kyaaa! Why is this so good?!"
>ah yes, the cute gem eating parfait noises
>perhaps someone might get a nosebleed..
| >>591257
"Oh girl, no don't do that so close of the microphone, I know it sounds like that ASMRBDBBQ stuff but I'm pretty sure it is someone's fetish and we don't want that out there" -N
"what, and I can't stress this enough, the fuck" -X
"So what brought you to brighten our day today gem?" -N
| >>591511
"Waahh curse words!
Mister ex you know those are bad!"
>she giggles
"Mmmm...well do i need a reason mister neil?
I only hope your day and the day of any listeners is as wonderful as how you all made mine!"
>heart=burst
| >>591545
"Ya' know, I'm sure the swearin' is the lesser evil in this place" -X
"Girl you see I'm the first one to doubt someone can be that happy with no absolute reason, but your positive vibes are welcome, appreciated and well needed" -N
| "I-ok? I swear to God she better be ok since people have a tendency to call us before dying" -N
"That will definitely increase our call rate and not scare out possible callers no sir" -X
| >Call coming from line 545
| "Oh man just in time, ah' though we were gonna have to start makin' original content" -X
"God forbid" -N
| >>591828
>Xii picks up line '545'
"Hello and welcome to Radio Wire, you're officially talkin' on the least used line with the least incompetent host of our times, this is Xii and ah' wanna know who's behind the phone this time?" -X
| “Good day to you and everyone at the station today, I just wanted to know if you guys heard about the theory someone mentioned online that Gem may be a bioengineered girl by VinderTech to be a door-to-door salesperson”
| >>591881
"Ah' mean.. She' has never tried to sell us anythin', literally all she does when she calls is sing and be extremely positive, but it'd explain why she's never sad. Like, at all" -X
| “The thing that bothers me the most about the whole thing is why would a company like VinderTech spend was I assume would be millions of dollars or bioengineering just for a salesperson?”
| >>591904
"The thing that bothers me is that ah' just told you she ain't seems like a salesperson, ya' came here only to get yer' weird theory on air don't you?" -X
| >the ring on 555 is back
>hmm...same numbers..seems she resolved whatever happened
| >>592014
>Neil picks up line '555'
"Hello and welcome to cursed calls incorporated, my name is Neil and--Waaait we got this number registered, Frenchman?" -N
| >>592036
"Uwaahhh sorry.."
>its gem again
"Some seagulls came and took my phone!
How rude!
...
Uhhh what was i saying before i hang up?"
| >>592047
"You were making some questionable cute noises as you were eating what I can safely assume was either screws or coins, also being all happy about making our day better" -N
|
|
| "Need a safe delivery? Sign up for O.O.P.S delivery service for a quick and safe treatment of your package with guaranteed quality!" -R
"Sounds like someone's daughter doesn't want to say her lines" -X
"Quit it.." -R
| >>592085 >>592761
"...questionable no-...oooohhh!
Right the parfait!
I was going to as-
Whoa! Who has a daughter!?
Can i say hii!?
I bet they are just as wonderful as the parent is!"
>she was about to say something but it seems she got distracted again
>such is the ways of the cookies and cream girl
| >>592780
"Not at all! Their parent is tiny and bitter like a lemon, and she's a sweet cinnamon roll, kinda like you but some-freaking-how more human, maybe you really are a clone girl" - N
| >>592919
"Uwwaahhh now i wanna give her a hug!
Must be hard with a mom who is sour all the time..
Mm...?
Im a clone?
Who said that?
One second
Hey Cassius am i a clone?"
>she asks someone far away from the phone
"ᵂʰᵃᵗˀ ᴺᵒ ᵗʰᵃᵗˢ ˢᵗᵘᵖᶦᵈ"
>although far away, you can somewhat make out their reply
"Uhh i dont think im a clone."
| >>592919
"I mean there's some lunatic out there that keeps saying you're a clone made from V-Tech, now wich V-Tech this time I honestly can't tell because seriously, don't they know there are other letters??" -N
"...Anyway, some lunatic is saying you are and this mother is an angry little man" -N
|
| >>591890
"Hey there Mr.You. Ya' still there? I'm not gettin' any younger and the girl is actually on the other line now if ya' wanna ask yourself" -X
| >call on line 535
| >>593748
>After a slight wait California picks up line '535'
>"Hello and welcome dear listener to Radio Wire: Home of the good, the bad and the Cute! You are speaking with California and California is speaking with you. Now, who am I lucky enough to be talking with?"
| >>593822
"Good evening, I am Professor Bartol Bolivar Bishop, and I'm calling to correct Mister X's statement on the author of the theory. The man you're talking to, he is nothing but a fraud. I, on the other hand, am the real author of that theory, which I fostered as it was my own child, feeding it on my fine insight and power of deduction, and now I claim my rightful place. Now, if you excuse me, I shall go back to repairing my tin foil hats collection"
>The call ends abruptly.
| >"I-ok??"
>Xii hangs up on line '545'
"I honestly can't believe people are arguin' about who came up with that stupid theory first" -X
"I find it kind of poetic, the right to own a shitpost" -N
| >>592987
"You still there girl? I know it's bad luck to hang up on angels but I'm getting zero reception here" -N
| >Neil clicks on line '555'
"I really miss when we used to get calls from easily prank-able people, you know, losers" -N
"I.. Don't think ya' should say that on live" -X
"No no it's ok, all my friends are losers so I can say it" -N
"First, that's not how it works. Second, screw you" -X
| "Man I'm so bored, when you said Radio wasn't dead I didn't though we were killing it ourselves" -N
"don't be exaggerated" -X
"we have been nothing but background music for hours! Let me check what do we have scheduled for this month" -N
This thread is permanently archived
| >"RADIO WIRE, RESTABLISHING CONNECTION"
\
>"STATUS: CONNECTED"
\
>"NUMBERS"
>"555-XXXXXX MAIN LINE RAN BY NEIL"
>"545-XXXXXXX SECONDARY LINE RAN BY XII"
>"535-XXXXXX COMPLEMENTARY LINE RAN BY CALIFORNIA"
>"515-XXXXXX 'PRVT' BUSINESS LINE"
\
>"MUSIC, NEWS, EVENTS. 24/7"